A new year and, typically, resolutions to be made….then discarded in a fiery blaze a short time later.
2019 was an unusual year but I learned a lot during it.
I, finally, learned that I am too ambitious with my plans. The plans only work when there is a regimented schedule and calm all the time. My life is never like that no matter how hard I try to be scheduled and “productive”. My life type versus the plans ends with me feeling guilty and disillusioned because I cannot fulfill the plans as I desired. Eventually, I become apathetic about the things I want to accomplish – even when time allows for the things to be done – and they don’t get done.
Some of the physical results of my over-ambition were scaled back/down during 2019. This scaling back/down brought about good things into my life for which I am grateful. These good things are what helped me realize my error in planning.
I also learned that talking about certain goals, resolutions, desires, and tasks are a great way NOT to get them to come into being. Talking about them are actually a fantastic way to get them ripped to shreds by others that do not have the best of intentions even when they claim they want nothing but the best for someone. No one wants or needs that kind of toxicity in their lives.
Both these lessons, in a way, sort of sabotaged my blog & social media presence later on in 2019, along with just being busy, as I struggled to find balance with the lessons within what means to be outwardly productive.
Always learning, always growing. 2020 will be no different in that regard.