I did not mean to disappear. Responsibilities landed elsewhere for awhile. Far, so far, away from writing and the creative drive I hold so dear. As I type this, it is 1am. I should be sleeping but my neighbors are decidedly obnoxious – the downside of living in an apartment – and my mind is busy contemplating what to do with an idea. An idea that was once applied to a potential verse novel. This novel died a most horrible death in the long run because of flaws with the world building, character building, and lack of a true antagonist. It was my first attempt at taking my very organic spur of the moment poetic writing style and turning it into something structured. Parts of it went well. Other parts…not so much. I learned a lot about myself as a writer and as a poet from this process.
I considered taking it apart. Reusing some pieces, discarding the rest, yet this seemed like the wrong route to take. Starting over entirely seems to be the most logical way to approach this. It seems to be paying off thus far. The idea has a few antagonists now, and the world sits on a more reasonable foundation & timeline. The characters need more fleshing out as far as their goals and motivations are concerned. Overall, I like the changes. The core concept is still the same as is the two main characters and their ultimate ending. Everything in between, concept wise, is much stronger than in the previous incarnation.
I also ruminated on what to do with the verses of the prior work. I loathe the concept of discarding them entirely. A large portion of them are very beautiful poems. I won’t lie – there are some really horrible poems in there too. I think the good and beautiful will see the light of the day soon as their own book because it seems wrong to keep them in the dark.
For now, I’m attempting to establish my focus on taking this better conceived core idea and turning it into a novel of some kind while also working on Hallow & Hearth. April, June, and September are becoming strong contenders for months that will be a pain in my behind. Trying to be optimistic that I’ll be able to keep some kind of creative momentum going during them while being extremely focused & productive in May, July, August, and the remainder of 2016.
Yowl & Yarrow was a surprisingly difficult book to write. My life was very much in transition during its writing. A great deal of the poems are very reminiscent of stress and great dislike over drastic change. I also experienced intense depression due to these changes which influenced the tone of the book whenever I did manage to write something. My state of depression was creatively hindering but there were brief moments of bright creativity. During the process, I learned I was going to have a niece (arriving April 2016), I moved into a new home of very own after 25 months of living with various family members, I realized the patterns which correspond with sliding into depression, and I discovered that I am indeed capable of ‘fangirling’ & happiness. All of this filters into the tones and themes of Yowl & Yarrow‘s 100 poems.
Yarrow may ease their earthly burdens
Across the fields stretching farther
Bypassing tchotchkes placed in sacred
Ceremonies to mask crossroads
On the breeze in penance
The $9.99 paperback is available through Amazon and CreateSpace, and the $2.99 eBook is available for Kindle.
Tomorrow is the day where I finally have access to my new home. It isn’t time to move yet though. The entire bathroom needs replacing as does all of the flooring. The kitchen may need to be gutted and restored too. I continue to be optimistic that the move can happen during the last week of October so I can be “moved in” in time for National Novel Writing Month.
November is quickly sneaking up on me. I suspect that I will be “pantsing” any novel-writing attempt or focusing solely on poetry writing. I haven’t written a poem in 3 weeks so poetry writing for NaNoWriMo isn’t a horrific idea.
The next few weeks will be very different for me schedule-wise. If I’m not at the new place working, I will be at my mom’s house moving boxes from the basement, living room, and guest room to the garage so they can be easily loaded into my car. Once the new flooring is in, I will – most likely – make daily trips out to the new place to deposit the boxes and unload the critical ones (the kitchen items).
Extremely intent on my mission to move during October. There are doubters to my cause but I remain focused.
Even though I think the new place is still a bit too large – at 920 square feet – and has one too many rooms, I’m grateful for the extra room as all the boxes will go there until unpacking which will leave the other functional rooms unburdened with clutter. Thus assisting greatly with my creative focus. A focus I currently do not possess because I am so entrenched in the rehab and moving intentions.
Once the move and NaNoWriMo are over, I plan to be more active with this blog and blogging in general. I have ideas, plans, and goals for this. I also have ideas, plans, and goals for novels. Novels will be my primary focus. I plan to take two-three months and spend a bulk of the time outlining then writing the first drafts of a couple different novels.
I had all these grand plans for this blog, starting in July, but so little came to be. I had grand plans to finish Yowl & Yarrow too yet it sits at 40% completion. There is an excellent reason for these shortcomings, and it is made from wood, plaster, cement.
At the beginning of the month, I came across a listing of decent price for what my family wanted to purchased for their financial benefit and my residential benefit. A week later, the bid was in, accepted, and we hopped the whirlwind to a quick close date. Last week was the closing. I will be moving soon. Not entirely sure on how soon is soon, but I’m hoping it is before the end of 2015.
All this inherent chaos with the closing and the prospect of moving has rather killed my drive to do any writing. Mostly, I’m just tired for a wide variety of reasons including the closing. I am excited that I will be getting my own place soon. Just trying to be not too excited or optimistic since there’s a lot of loose ends hanging around which can prolong the process. The longer the process goes and the more excited I am, the more pissed off and disillusioned I’ll get about the process.
One potential other good thing to come out of July is the opportunity to sell my books at a new bookstore opening up in Longmont, Colorado which will only stock books by authors in Colorado, primarily Northern Colorado. Local Editions is officially opening for business on August 15th, and it will copies of Passion & Prudence on hand. I am certain that there will be further mention of Local Editions in the near future.
Surprisingly, or perhaps unsurprisingly, Camp NaNoWriMo did not get off to the best start due to life things. I did cross the 2,000 poems written threshold on July 1st which I did not realize until July 4th. The 2,000th poem is called Verbal Patterns.
In spite of assorted life distractions, progress is coming along for Yowl & Yarrow. While writing up content for Sable Quill Creations’ blog, I stumbled upon something that may help me with figuring out what to do with my works of fiction in halted progress. Hoping to utilize the information as Camp NaNoWriMo progresses.
Learned that NaNoWriMo participation may be an impossibility this year. Cannot elaborate further at this point – do not want to jinx it. The timeline and information is still extremely fluid and unsettled. A little sad about the potential lack of NaNoWriMo in my life but excited about the why there will be a lack of NaNoWrimo. There is much exclamation of ‘Finally!’ too.
Have to keep my fingers crossed which makes for entertaining typing.
Wishing everyone happy writing and much productivity!